Funny cop jokes are the perfect way to lighten the mood while still tipping our hats to law enforcement.
From silly puns to laugh-out-loud one liners, these jokes keep things lighthearted and fun
. Whether you’re sharing laughs at a party, telling family-friendly jokes with kids, or looking for clever one-liners to post online, cop jokes always hit the mark.
Below, we’ve rounded up the very best funny cop jokes organized into categories for kids, adults, coworkers, and everyone in between.
Get ready for laughter, because these jokes are under arrest for being hilarious!
Classic Funny Cop Jokes 👮
- Why did the cop sit on the clock? He wanted to be on time.
- Why was the cop always calm? Because he knew how to remain “at ease.”
- Why did the police officer go to art school? He wanted to learn how to draw his gun.
- Why did the cop write a ticket on the computer? It was speeding through downloads.
- Why did the police officer bring a pencil? To draw his own conclusions.
- Why don’t cops ever get lost? They always follow the law of the land.
- Why did the officer take a ladder to work? He was going undercover.
- What’s a policeman’s favorite type of shoes? Patrol boots.
- Why was the cop always a good singer? He knew all the right notes.
- What did the cop say to the hungry thief? “You have the right to remain stuffed.”
Short Funny Cop Jokes 🚔
- Police work: 99% paperwork, 1% donuts. 🍩
- Cops never retire, they just go undercover.
- Sirens: cop music on shuffle. 🎶
- Police motto: arrest today, paperwork forever.
- Traffic cops know how to “brake” bad news.
- Handcuffs: original friendship bracelets.
- Police lights: instant disco.
- A cop’s diet? Lots of stakeouts. 🥩
- What’s a cop’s least favorite vegetable? Leeks.
- Funny cop jokes: the best form of “armed” comedy.
Funny Cop Jokes for Kids 👦👧
- Why did the policeman bring a red pen? In case he had to draw blood.
- What do you call a sleeping policeman? An undercover cop.
- Why did the kid bring a ladder to the police station? To see justice on a higher level.
- What’s a policeman’s favorite color? Blue, of course! 💙
- Why did the cop cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
- What do you call a police dog with no badge? An “underdog.” 🐶
- Why are police always strong? Because they do plenty of “arrests.”
- Why did the computer go to the police? It caught a virus.
- What’s a policeman’s favorite snack? Cop-corn. 🍿
- Why did the cop sit on the cake? He wanted to keep it “under cover.”
Funny Cop Knock-Knock Jokes 🚪
- Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Police.
Police who?
Police stop telling bad jokes! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Arrest.
Arrest who?
Arrest of these jokes are hilarious! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Justice.
Justice who?
Justice for fun, I’m telling you a joke. - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Warrant.
Warrant who?
Warrant you glad I’m not arresting you? - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Siren.
Siren who?
Siren you tired of my police jokes yet?
Funny Traffic Cop Jokes 🚦
- Why did the traffic cop sit on the stoplight? He wanted to control his emotions.
- Why was the traffic cop a great cook? He knew all the right “stops.”
- What did the cop say to the speeding sandwich? “Lettuce slow down.” 🥪
- Why did the stop sign go to school? To get a little more street smarts.
- Why did the traffic cop always win races? He set the pace.
- What’s a cop’s favorite type of tea? Traff-ic tea.
- Why did the car apply for a job? It wanted to get hired instead of tired.
- Why did the traffic cop smile? Because he was signal-minded.
- Why did the police officer arrest the bicycle? It was two-tired. 🚲
- What do cops and stoplights have in common? They both change when they’re watched.
Funny Cop Food Jokes 🍔🍩
- Why did the policeman go to the bakery? For long “stakeouts.”
- Why do cops love donuts? Because they’re hole-hearted. 🍩
- What’s a policeman’s favorite fruit? Blue-berries.
- Why did the cop carry ketchup? For traffic jams.
- Why did the burger call the cops? It was in a pickle.
- Why do cops never starve? Because they’re always on stakeouts. 🥩
- Why did the pizza call the police? It was being stalked.
- What do you call a cop’s favorite dessert? Custard-y duty.
- Why was the cop eating soup? To get the scoop.
- Why did the bread call the police? Because it was loafing around.
Funny Cop Partner Jokes 👮👮♀️
- Why do police officers make great partners? They always back you up.
- What did one cop say to the other during lunch? “You take the fries, I’ll take the case.” 🍟
- Why do cops always work in pairs? For double the arrest power.
- What’s a police partner’s favorite game? Backup and tag.
- Why did the police partner bring a broom? To sweep the case clean.
- Why did the cops love math? They always worked in pairs.
- What do you call a police duo that sings? The Blues Brothers. 🎤
- Why did the partner bring glue? To stick to the case.
- What’s the best cop partnership? Good cop, funnier cop.
- Why do partners always share jokes? For double the laughs.
Funny Cop Work Jokes 📋
- Why did the officer take a notebook? To “arrest” his thoughts.
- Why do cops write fast? They’re ticket masters.
- Why was the police report so funny? It was full of punch lines.
- Why did the cop carry a flashlight? To shed light on the case.
- Why was the desk sergeant always smiling? Because he filed everything under “fun.”
- Why did the evidence laugh? It was cracking the case.
- Why are cop radios so funny? They always have good signals. 📻
- Why did the officer laugh at the crime scene? The joke was a “dead giveaway.”
- Why are police files like comedians? They deliver lines.
- Why was the badge shiny? It polished off the case.
Funny Cop Animal Jokes 🐕🐴
- Why do police dogs make great comedians? They always have “paws-itively” good timing.
- Why did the horse join the police? He wanted to be a neigh-borhood watch. 🐴
- Why did the police cat get promoted? It had nine lives of experience.
- Why are police dogs brave? They never paws for fear.
- What did the owl say to the cop? “Whoo’s under arrest?” 🦉
- Why did the chicken call the police? It saw a fowl crime. 🐔
- Why did the police fish arrest the shark? It was being shellfish.
- What’s a cow’s favorite cop TV show? Law and Udder. 🐄
- Why did the police goat get hired? Because he was the G.O.A.T.
- Why do police horses love jokes? They always stirrup laughs.
Best Funny Cop Jokes for Sharing 🌟
- Why did the police officer go to the library? To book the criminals. 📚
- Why did the computer get arrested? It committed a cyber-crime.
- Why are police jokes the best? They’re always on patrol.
- Why did the policeman bring string? To tie up loose ends.
- Why was the calendar arrested? It had too many dates.
- Why was the belt arrested? It was holding up a pair of pants.
- Why did the cop love his car? It was arrest-worthy. 🚓
- Why are police jokes like handcuffs? They always click.
- Why did the cop go to music school? To learn how to conduct. 🎵
- Why are funny cop jokes so popular? They never get old—they’re always on the case!
🎯 Conclusion: Funny Cop Jokes Keep the Laughter Rolling
From food jokes to traffic puns, funny cop jokes bring laughter and lighten the mood.
They’re kid friendly, office-ready, and perfect for sharing anywhere.
Humor is a great way to connect and these jokes prove that even serious jobs deserve a good laugh.
👉 Share these cop jokes with friends, family, or coworkers and let the laughter patrol begin! 🚨
Colorful, bold, and proud—Drew struts through sentences with feather-light puns