Funny police jokes are a lighthearted way to laugh at everyday situations involving cops, traffic, and life on patrol.
They’re family-friendly, office-ready, and perfect for breaking the ice at parties or sharing online.
From classic one-liners to clever puns, these jokes show the lighter side of law enforcement while keeping the humor respectful and fun.
If you’re looking for hilarious police jokes for kids, adults, or coworkers, you’ve come to the right place.
Here are the best funny police jokes that will have you under arrest for laughing too hard!
Classic Funny Police Jokes 👮
- Why did the police officer go to the baseball game? He heard someone was stealing bases.
- Why did the cop sit on the clock? He wanted to be on time.
- Why was the police officer at the concert? To keep things in “tune.”
- Why did the officer carry a pencil? To draw his weapon.
- Why was the policeman calm? He knew how to remain “at ease.”
- Why did the police officer bring string? To tie up loose ends.
- Why did the policeman love math? He loved solving problems.
- What do you call a policeman’s lunch break? A cop-out.
- Why did the officer sit on the cake? He was undercover.
- What did the police say to the thief? “Don’t take it personally.”
Funny Police Jokes for Kids 👦👧
- What do you call a sleeping policeman? An undercover cop.
- Why did the kid call the police? His homework was stolen.
- What’s a policeman’s favorite snack? Cop-corn. 🍿
- Why did the cop cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
- What do you call a police dog with no badge? An underdog. 🐶
- Why was the policeman’s report card good? He was on his best “arrest” behavior.
- What’s a cop’s favorite color? Blue. 💙
- Why did the computer call the police? It caught a virus.
- What do you call a police cat? Claw enforcement. 🐱
- Why did the policeman bring a ladder? To see the higher-ups.
Funny Police Knock-Knock Jokes 🚪
- Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Police.
Police who?
Police stop with the silly jokes! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Warrant.
Warrant who?
Warrant you glad I’m not arresting you? - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Arrest.
Arrest who?
Arrest of these jokes are hilarious! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Justice.
Justice who?
Justice for fun, I’m telling you a joke! - Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cop.
Cop who?
Cop a seat and I’ll tell you more jokes.
Funny Traffic Police Jokes 🚦
- Why did the traffic cop bring a red pen? To draw the line.
- Why did the stoplight go to school? To learn some manners.
- Why did the traffic cop smile? He was signal-minded.
- Why was the traffic cop a good cook? He always knew when to stop and go.
- Why did the sandwich get pulled over? It was on a roll. 🥪
- What’s a traffic cop’s favorite music? Heavy metal. 🎸
- Why did the cop arrest the bicycle? It was two-tired. 🚲
- Why do traffic cops make great DJs? They drop the best beats.
- Why did the stop sign get promoted? It had great stopping power.
- Why did the cop always win races? He set the pace.
Funny Police Food Jokes 🍩🍔
- Why do police love donuts? Because they’re hole-hearted. 🍩
- Why did the cop carry ketchup? For traffic jams.
- Why did the pizza call the police? It was being stalked.
- Why do cops never starve? They’re always on stakeouts. 🥩
- Why did the burger call the police? It was in a pickle. 🍔
- What’s a cop’s favorite fruit? Blue-berries. 🫐
- Why did the bread report a crime? It was loafing around.
- What dessert do police love? Custard-y duty.
- Why did the soup call the police? It wanted to spill the beans. 🍲
- Why did the popcorn call 911? It was popping off.
Funny Police Partner Jokes 👮👮♀️
- Why do cops always work in pairs? Double the arrest power.
- What do you call a singing police duo? The Blues Brothers. 🎤
- Why did one cop bring fries? So his partner could catch up. 🍟
- Why are police partners so loyal? They always back each other up.
- Why did the partner bring glue? To stick with the case.
- What’s the best team? Good cop, funnier cop.
- Why did the partners laugh? They had great arrest chemistry.
- Why did the partners bring a broom? To sweep the case clean.
- Why do partners love math? They always work in pairs.
- Why did the police partners tell jokes? For double the laughs.
Funny Police Work Jokes 📋
- Why did the officer carry a flashlight? To shed light on the case.
- Why are police reports funny? They’re full of punch lines.
- Why did the evidence laugh? It cracked the case.
- Why did the badge shine? It polished off the job.
- Why was the cop’s notebook funny? It had arresting details.
- Why are police radios hilarious? They always have great signals.
- Why did the officer laugh at the crime scene? It was a dead giveaway.
- Why did the desk sergeant smile? Everything was filed under “fun.”
- Why do police jokes click? Just like handcuffs.
- Why was the cop always writing? He loved to ticket jokes.
Funny Police Animal Jokes 🐶🐴
- Why do police dogs make great comedians? Paws-itively funny. 🐕
- Why did the horse join the police? For neigh-borhood watch. 🐴
- Why did the chicken call the police? It saw a fowl crime. 🐔
- What’s a cow’s favorite police show? Law and Udder. 🐄
- Why did the cat become a cop? For claw enforcement. 🐱
- Why was the fish arrested? For being shellfish. 🐟
- Why do police dogs never fail? They always sniff out the truth.
- Why did the owl join the force? To ask, “Whoo’s guilty?” 🦉
- Why was the goat hired? He was the G.O.A.T.
- Why do police horses laugh? They stirrup the fun.
Best Funny Police Jokes to Share 🌟
- Why did the computer get arrested? It committed a cyber-crime.
- Why did the calendar go to jail? Too many dates.
- Why was the belt arrested? It was holding up pants.
- Why do police like music? They know how to conduct. 🎶
- Why did the cop bring a ladder? He was going undercover.
- Why did the library call the police? Too many overdue books. 📚
- Why do police jokes never get old? They’re always on patrol.
- Why did the cop eat his report? His boss said it was a piece of cake. 🍰
- Why was the cop’s car tired? Too many pursuits.
- Why do funny police jokes work? They always deliver the punchline.
🎯 Conclusion: Funny Police Jokes Bring the Laughs
From food puns to traffic humor, funny police jokes prove that laughter is the best backup.
They’re clean, witty, and safe for kids, coworkers, or family fun.
Next time you need a quick smile, pull out one of these jokes they’re sure to light up the room.
👉 Share these jokes online or with friends and let laughter patrol your day! 🚓
Serving sizzling hot puns, crispy and delicious every time.